I was chatting with my BFF the other day and we started reminiscing on our “fun years”. Those came pretty early for us, we went hard from 16-18 thanks to fake IDs. As much fun as it was I have to be realistic and accept that I will never party like that again, nor do I want to. My body can’t take it! Sometimes I feel like I’m 27 going on 50. I also started thinking about the things I took for granted prior to having kids, I come from a home where my mom didn’t like closed doors and it was something that always irked me. I would have my sister or mom coming in and out of the washroom as I was taking a shower, sometimes they wouldn’t even bother closing the door again! Despite that, had I known then what I know now I wouldn’t have cared so much.
Privacy has now become a luxury in my life. As a mom you learn to appreciate whatever little time you can get to yourself. People without children don’t seem to understand when I refer to my time at work as my “me time”. I will usually book my hair appointments, sit and write, enjoy a warm meal, etc. during my lunch hour at work.
In no particular order here are a few things I would like to do in private:
- Take a shower without hearing my daughter’s voice coming through the bottom crack of the door asking if I’m done yet or that she “needs” to come in the washroom. (This would be the 2-year-old as the 7-year-old has figured out how to open the washroom door from the outside using a coin or butter knife on the days that I actually lock it.)
- Use the washroom at home without hearing little fists knocking on the door asking me if I’m doing number one or number two, or that she has to wash her hands, brush her teeth, get her toy….you get the idea.
- Sleep in my damn underwear! My apartment can get pretty stifling in the summer, the AC just doesn’t make it into the bedrooms and having to sleep with my daughter really limits my options as to how I can sleep more comfortably.
- Try on clothes in a change room when I go shopping. Thank God we’re past the ‘bring stroller EVERYWHERE’ phase! I would have to fit a stroller (which would be piled up not just with baby but baby bag, jackets, purchases…kitchen sink), my daughters and myself. Now I don’t have to push a stroller around but I have had to run out of dressing rooms half-naked chasing the little one because she managed to escape through the bottom part of the door =/
- Have sex! Yes that’s right, I said it! You know nothing can kill the mood more than having to be alert for pitter patter of little footsteps, creaking of doors or God forbid peeking heads from around corners. I’ve gotten to a point that I just can’t be bothered with having sex anymore! It’s not like I can fully get into it anyways. My poor hubby lol.
- Groom myself. This particular list includes things like fixing my hair, applying make up, sandblasting the dead skin cells off my feet, painting my nails, etc. Would be nice to do these things without having them tell me they’re hungry, or hearing them start screaming and fighting, or all of a sudden turn around to catch my little one painting her eyebrows with black mascara because she wants to be like mommy. It’s funny because whenever I put a little more effort into making myself look/feel pretty I get asked “Where are you going?” or “How come you’re putting all that stuff on?” Which will give you an idea of just how often I get to do these things.
This list can keep going but I’m sure you ladies get the idea. Enjoy the time you get to do you because once those kids come into your life as hectic as it may seem you’ll think back and realise just how boring life used to be without them.
Guest blogpost for The Broken Heel Diaries