I found these printed in some old torn up magazine…ironic right?
Take the proper time out
Make sure you give yourself a proper amount of healing time, otherwise you paying for it later. Like walking on a broken leg, your heart needs time to heal as well. Although filling the void with a new person is tempting, it generally leads to disaster. It alleviates the pain of now, but generally remains at the back of your mind festering. You don’t want to explain to your new partner 3 months down the line that you still love your ex, it wont go over very well.
Find a way to express your emotions
Write, draw or doodle, and try to find someway to convert your insecurities to something constructive. Why is 75% of music or poetry about heartbreak or lost love, coincidence, I think not. Writing helps organize the bubbling thoughts in your mind. Arguments and inconsistencies that you’d generally like to harass your ex over will roam the mental plane until they get a chance to escape in one way or another. Best to let them out on paper, instead of over the phone 5 sad tequila shots into the night.
Avoid over analysis
It’s going to be tempting to over think everything, but it’s definitely not recommended.
- Were they lying to me the entire time?
- Will I ever love someone like this again?
- When did they fall out of love with me?
- When they said they were just friends with that girl, were they?
- Did I impact them, or will I be forgotten?
No matter what the circumstance, there’s always going to be some unanswered questions. The smallest details suddenly seems important, and your mind craves nothing but the truth. You know the relationship is over, but for some reason you want it to be justified. Sadly, lost love doesn’t always have a reason, it just happens, and the answer you seek may not exist. Do your best to constructively get your mind off of things.
After you’ve dealt with most of your mental recovery its time to get your closure. It’s different for every person but this is the key moment you get over your ex. Like a flip of the switch, the pain will be greatly relieved. The realization that things will never be the same again, and that you’re ready to accept it and move on with your life. It’s never definite what will set this change reaction off, but it is necessary for your mind to be at peace.
Accepting your new reality…without resentment
The heartbreak is over, and you’re ready to step out in the world, what now? Your past relationship was full of great memories, experiences and adventures, why put negative feelings towards them just because things didn’t work out?
“It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.”
One should appreciate love for what it was, not for what it is now, even if it can no longer be. The lies, deception, and miscommunication around the end should not ruin your interpretation of the experience as a whole. What you should concentrate on is how you felt at the time, not what your current reality is. You enjoyed it at the time, and you want to live without regret.
Lets hope to be able to look back upon the good memories with your ex and feel warm, knowing that they are over and will never be again, but to appreciate them nonetheless for what they are. When you can remember the old times warmly without pining for them you’ll know that you’ve reached a new level of mental enlightenment.
Good luck to all the love-sick fools out there…
So what do you guys think? Good advice? Do you have anymore you would like to share with me. This crap isn’t getting any easier for me, especially when the thoughts start creeping in of somebody else being in the picture…there has to be a way to speed up the healing process of a broken heart.