I know you’re out there and you can take as long as you need to find your way to me, I know it will happen at the right moment. You need to live life a little and experience heartaches and joys so that you can become a stronger man for me. You will be able to look back on your heart breaks and know first hand what it feels like so you won’t break my heart, I promise to do the same and make sure not to break yours.

I’ve been hurt beyond repair but its these scars that are forming me into the woman I am becoming so that I may be able to communicate with you and be understanding. I am weary right now and I’m sure for a long time to come, to open my heart up to anyone so I know that when it does happen it will be a love that will be new, untainted and real. I will know it’s you when I feel like I can finally breathe again. I will know it’s you when I don’t have to keep clutching myself together so that I don’t fall apart, you will be there to patch up the huge hole that was left in me. Most importantly, I will know it’s you when the loves of my life can look at you and realize that I am the love of yours and accept, understand and love you.

I’m not ready for you yet so I know that you’re not ready for me. I need to grow some more and live for me and my babies now so that I can have the satisfaction as a mother and as a woman of knowing that nothing I’ve experienced has been in vain and that I am where I’m supposed to be and headed to where I’m meant to be. This is the first of many letters but know that someday we’ll be together.

Mare

6 thoughts on “Dear Future Husband,

  1. Reblogged this on Mafa's World and commented:

    Exactly a year and a day ago I wrote this letter to someone out there. Little did I know that someone was boarding a plane and was on his way to me that very same day. The next night our paths crossed and that’s all she wrote. I’ll admit it wasn’t “love at first sight” and there weren’t angels choirs singing or anything like that but there was something there and it progressively grew into something more that same night and the couple of days that followed that we were actually able to enjoy each others company. Ironically enough I just finished reading Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist for the umpeenth time and thinking back on the series of events from a year ago there are two quotes that keep resonating for me. One is “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” And now I say to my husband “So, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.”

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